Here's To The World

There are things that are not visible if one simply looks at my resume, my transcript, the college I attend, or the degree I earn. The world cannot look at my paperwork and see that I am a true friend, a lover, a person you can rely on, a person who listens. The world will not know that I spent the early part of nighttime staring at the stars, attending a concert, and taking photographs with my dearest friends. I can not show the world just how much each and every little activity has affected me, and how it has changed me as a human being. I can not even begin to describe how much the stroke of my brush across canvas makes me feel, nor can I tell the world how much I have dreamed about falling in love with the perfect man, how I've dreamed about becoming recognized as an artist. Upon observation of my statistics and lists that supposedly describe me, the world can not know that wherever I go, wherever I end up, I will paint, smile, laugh, calculate, sing out of key, write, rhyme, joke, listen, console, talk, dream, pray, read, love, and create. Maybe there is a chance that the world will not acknowledge my accomplishments that are documented on paper, but I can hope that someday it will be inspired enough to sense my footsteps across it's terrain and maybe amidst all the others hear what I have to say.

Catchy Songs

Ok...we all know them as the songs that you can't stop singing, the songs that keep running through our head. Some are good, others are just insanely catchy jingles that plague our thoughts for hours or days.

The 10 Top Ten Catchy Songs

1. Don't Stop Believin'--Journey

Who the hell thought that a song about a small town girl taking a train at midnight would be so catchy. Also, the fact that 95.7% of the American population knows some or all of the lyrics makes it a contagious sing-a-long song.

2. Bad Day--Daniel Powter

Sometime having a bad day can be inspiring, but really? A song about a bad day is full of horrible analogies, and a catchy synthesized keyboard part. It was part of that one commercial during that add campaign for that one insurance company (I know you know what I'm talking about), everyone and their mother was humming along by the end of that maddening add campaign.

3. We Didn't Start The Fire-- Billy Joel

Almost no one knows this song word for word, but everyone knows Billy Joel's voice soaring through the melodious chorus. Who the hell knows "Rosenberghbombsugaraypamunjonrandbrokerkingandiandthecatcherintherye", but every one know "we didn't start the fire, it was always burin since the world's been turnin...". Selective hearing is certainly the culprit.

4. Bad Romance-- Lady Gag

Who thought that baby talk could be so damn catchy. So many people ignore the words to this song, but they know the ga ga oh la la part. It is always funny to see people at a party turn to listen to this song and sing along. Anybody who hates Lady Gaga has to give her credit for creating a catchy song out of phonetic garble.

5. Seasons of Love--Rent

Although this song was popularized by the hit movie in 2003, the song was originally in the on Broadway production of the musical by the same name. Johnathan Larson managed to introduce many American's to an odd trivia fact...that there are indeed 525600 minutes in a year.

6. Baby One More Time--Britney Spears

An often over-parodied song that has a smokin' music video to accompany it. This was before Britney became the trashy celebrity that she is now. Her smoky voice lured guys and girls alike into the world where "somethin' wasn't right".

7. Wannabe- Spice Girls

This is horribly catchy. It was played throughout the 90s at various functions. Yes, the Spice Girls were a rather interesting group, but honestly, the did create the "any way you want it that's the way you need it" refrain that flavored a generation's elementary school years.

8. The Lion Sleeps Tonight- the movie The Lion King

Seriously catchy Disney song. "We-de-de-de-de-de-de-de-we-um-um-a-way" Everyone watched this movie at least a few times during childhood, and they know this song. It's just a fun, quirky song with a catchy chorus.

9. Kissed A Girl--Katy Perry

I am fairly certain that the sales of cherry chapstick went up significantly after this song was released. Also, a great song for parties. Guys like the song because it is suggestive, and girls like the song because it isn't grinding hardcore rap.

10. Party In The U.S.A.--Miley Cyrus

Yes indeed. People do have issues with Miley Cyrus becoming a sex icon, and the fact that she is so young and has a really good voice for pop music should help negate that. I have seen grown men dancing to Party In The U.S.A. Although they immediately call "no homo" afterwards, I believe that this song has the power to move mountains. Even if the mountains take the form of rather large football players (you know who you are)

Photographic Editing

I don't like the idea that photos can be edited excessively though. I want the raw emotion and the real color. My favorite photographs are in the form of portraits where the subject is starting at the camera not smiling. There are some people who have their "photograph" smile, but when they smile it's much different. There are some people who always look mischievous, but when they smile the spark goes out of their eyes. There are others who aren't really happy, but they flash their award winning smile on command. Those people worry me, because you never know what they are thinking. Are they happy? Are they upset? You have no way of knowing because there are no visual cues.

A Poem for A Person

I listen for a sound

Like no other sound I know

Of hope and future dreams the sound spoke softly

Violet twilights spent listening to the sound in my ear

Every evening,every day, listening to the sound

Magically engulfing me in it's arms

Just before Sandman draws near

Bedtime calls and evening falls as I listen for a sound

I Should Be Irish

Being Irish on a day like today is certainly helpful when searching for reasons why you're going to feel like shit tomorrow. There is nothing like the justification, "My family would be proud of me for upholding ancient tradition"

Anyways, tonight will be a fun night thanks to my very Irish friend base. I hope I can pull off the all green thing.

Party safe but party hard!

The Wack zodiac

That's it. I've had enough with the old astrology system.

I'm tired of newspaper horoscopes giving me vague suppositions of my future feelings and actions. I have cracked open my last fortune cookie only to the following:

"I dream of sleep. Time to go to bed"

Um, hello? Tell me something that I don't know.

Nope, the old system isn't working anymore. Therefore, as a public service, I have devised a new, modern , and dare I say kick-ass zodiac system.

It's a simple system based on birth month. No more of that astrological crap where you have to remember the dividing lines each month.

Here it is:

Januarian

Special Animal: Ocelot

Dominant Furniture Item: End Table

Vibrational Cheese: Muenster

Overview: Those born in January are known for their shiny, manageable hair, the attractiveness of which might (or might not) be enhanced by oversized canine teeth. Born under what is often called the "Sign of the Fajita," Januarians have innate pan-frying skills, which they often call upon if cornered in the wild. Those born under this sign are fiercely protective of their young, although they do seem to dress them funny.

Februarian

Special Animal: Lemur

Dominant Furniture Item: Murphy Bed

Vibrational Cheese: Asiago

Overview: Those born under this sign have an unnatural knack for recalling hockey stats, an ability that is greatly amplified by shaping the hair into an organic data receptacle, also known as a "mullet." An intensely creative people, Februarians are known for their explosive clog dances and fiercely woven tote bags. Under no circumstances should a Februarian become involved with a Junite. (No, I can't tell you why. It's is one of several Untalkedabout Things in the Karm-O-Matic System. Der.)

Marcher

Special Animal: Stuffed Bear

Dominant Furniture Item: Clothes Hamper

Vibrational Cheese: Alpine Lace

Overview: Ah, the Marchers. You know them, of course, as fruit leather artisans to the world, but did you also know they were pioneers in applying tuberous flowers to Rose Parade floats? Well, there you go. Although generally mild-mannered, those born under the Marcher banner are also really good at flicking things with a spork if annoyed, so, you know, heads up on that.

Aprilite

Special Animal: Birdie

Dominant Furniture Item: Davenport (No, really, you can look it up.)

Vibrational Cheese: Gouda

Overview: Those born under the "Sign of the Charcoal Insole" are known for their fastidiousness...with one exception: they never, EVER, empty their car ashtrays. Landlords love Aprilites because they never stick thumbtacks in their apartment walls but instead use those little blobs of goo to hold their posters. 23% of Aprilites possess an overwhelming and unfounded fear of inflatable rafts.

Mayite Mayan Maynard Mayjor

Special Animal: Duck

Dominant Furniture Item: Ottoman

Vibrational Cheese: Aerosol Bacon Cheddar

Overview: Don't ever make fun of a Mayjor's hat. That goes double for the Members Only jacket. That's really all you need to know.

Junite

Special Animal: Armadillo

Dominant Furniture Item: Umbrella Stand

Vibrational Cheese: Cottage

Overview: Junites are affable folks who love nothing more than to rent a movie from Blockbuster, bury it in their backyard and then sit around and talk about what it might have been like to watch it. They never cut in line and the only thing that gets under their skin is when someone pronounces "et cetera" as "ECK cetera." Unfortunately, entire suburbs have been wiped out as a result of this sensitivity.

Julysaurus

Special Animal: Platypus

Dominant Furniture Item: TV Tray

Vibrational Cheese: Camembert

Overview: Known as the healers of the Karm-O-Matic System, Julysauruses are highly empathic, often describing others' feeling before said others are even aware of them. (Yes, it can be annoying.) A highly fragrant group, their soft, calming patchouli scent often lingers after they depart, in stark contrast to the acrid bite of smoking rubber from the patches their Corvettes laid on your driveway.

Augustonian

Special Animal: Gator

Dominant Furniture Item: Shelf

Vibrational Cheese: Mozzarella

Overview: Almost all middle-school principals are Augustonians. No one knows why and we're all too scared to ask. Many people also hold those born under this sign responsible for the recent and ill-advised "jeggings" trend. I once saw an Augustonian recharge a cell-phone battery by pressing it to his forehead while doing a Robert Goulet impression. True story.

Septemberite

Special Animal: Cougar

Dominant Furniture Item: Hooked Rug

Vibrational Cheese: Limburger

Overview: Septemberites tend to be extremely organized and have been known to cross-reference their socks by wool content and country of origin. They are an easygoing group and make ideal mates for every sign in the Karm-O-Matic System. They also make mustard that is so hot it can burn your eyelashes off. Okay, not really, but that would be cool.

Octoberian

Special Animal: Flounder

Dominant Furniture Item: Coffee Table

Vibrational Cheese: Blue

Overview: Octoberians can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never never never let you forget you're a--wait, let me turn that dang radio off. Okay. Octoberians. As far as I know, there's only one and she lives in a gated community outside of Seattle. Her neighbors say she keeps to herself, raises fighting voles and never takes off her crocheted hat. So there you have it.

Novemberite

Special Animal: Porpoise

Dominant Furniture Item: Bean Bag Chair

Vibrational Cheese: Brie

Overview: Some of our nation's most revered truckers are Novemberites. Fun fact: those born under this sign never forget a joke but they do occasionally forget to put on sweatpants before answering the door. Want to know the way to a Novemberite's heart? Offer him/her a brisk exfoliation. You're welcome.

Decemberonian

Special Animal: Owl

Dominant Furniture Item: Captain's Chair

Vibrational Cheese: Ricotta

Overview: You will never catch a Decemberonian wearing a belt and shoes that don't match. Exactly half of them like lobster. As a group, they are surprisingly non-hairy, although one of them (last seen in the Dallas vicinity) single-handedly makes up for that. A Decemberonian will always loan you a pencil, but for God's sakes, don't chew the eraser.

"More To Be Seen Than Could Ever Be Seen"

I have always been described as being different. In elementary school, I was smart, but different. I was a book nerd and quite a bit of a tomboy. In middle school, I tried to blaze my own path but was stopped short when I found that I couldn't manage to pull off the Avril-straight hair and still have time to socialize. Right around 8th grade I had managed to find a circle of friends that I was 100% comfortable with, and the hormones had settled down for the most part. But I was still different even within my friends. I was the intellectual with a flair for art and assorted interest that seemingly sprung from no where. For a week, I'd be obsessed with discovering everything I could about Andy Warhol's childhood, and the next week, I'd be focused on learning the history behind the Sound of Music. Meanwhile, my friends focused on learning how to drink coffee, reading Stephen King novels, and ice skating perfectly. My interest never stayed that long, and I was literally all over the place.

Far to much to take in here

More to find than could ever be found

-Circle of Life

Let's Get Naked

So, interesting thought:

If I walked into a room and went around asking people if I could just walk around nude what would they say? I'd be willing to bet they'd say "no", simply because it is not socially acceptable. But who dictates that? It's all flesh, arms are exposed, legs are exposed, midriffs can even be exposed, but why not other parts of our bodies.

Some may trace it back to the whole Adam and Eve thing, but in a society that is generally not religious is that even a legitimate excuse now?

(Thanks Colin Kuebler for this idea)